Blogging has taken a back seat for the summer...obviously.

At the start of the summer we made a summer list.  It is a wish list of all the things we want to do before the summer ends.  It is prominently displayed in our kitchen as a reminder of things to do.  The whole family contributed to it.  There are some really big things like taking a weekend trip to Rhode Island and some really small things like getting ice cream at our favorite ice cream shop. There are 36 things on the list and we have done 14 of them.  Now, some of the things on the list are done multiple times, like go to the lake, we have done this eleven times, and go to the ocean we have done six times.  Each time we complete something on the list we cross off the item.  If we have done something multiple times, it gets a tally mark. We've had a kid yard sale, selling all the big plastic toys that no one plays with anymore, not the actual kids.  We have gotten rid of our playroom all together and turned it into a big kid hang out with bean bag chairs, art supplies and games, we have gone strawberry picking, had a last day of school celebration complete with water balloon fight, we have gone swimming countless times, including night swimming in an outdoor lighted pool, made s'mores, gone to Rhode Island with five kids and no air conditioning in the car on a 90 degree day... We are having the best summer.  The kids are all amazing, (mine and the two I watch) the weather has been awesome, and the activities are endless.  We do take down days every now and then, and we have finally worked out the proper amount of food to bring along for a seven hour lake day (practically the entire fridge) and are just having a ball.  This weekend we are planning to climb a local (small) mountain with our dogs, and next weekend, hopefully camping at the lake.  The girls are all tan (despite the copious amounts of 50 SPF sunscreen being reapplied every few hours and SPF shirts, don't worry, Laura) and their hair is so much lighter.  The summer is my favorite time of year, and I am feeling like I really don't want school to start any time soon.  Luckily we still have six and a half weeks of summer left...despite the fact that Target is telling me that it's back to school time... I guess I just won't go there for another month or so.

Waves and feet

Will and I met in college in Newport, RI.  This sculpture is located right in the heart of downtown.  It was one of my favorite parts of the downtown area.  When we went to Rhode Island for my half marathon, we detoured to Newport to show the kids where we met.  It feels sort of full circle to have a picture of my girls here, it is such a part of my past and now they get to be part of that, too.

My most challenging episode as a Mother

I have had my fair share of difficult times with my girls.  There have been tantrums, power battles, stalling, all the normal stuff.  There have been incredibly difficult times, sickness of parents, both mine and Will's, Maya being in the hospital for so long after two weeks at home as an infant, and the wrath I endured from my oldest as a punishment for being gone so long.  That all sucked.  it really did, but it was completely doable because there was a reason for all of it.  Everything that happened had a cause, and so we could figure our way through it.  A few weeks ago Lilly decided that she wanted to learn to ride her bike without training wheels.  I was thrilled because I thought this day would never arrive.  Lilly is not a risk taker, in any sense of the word.  She also does not deal well with pain.  At all.  which we have learned to deal with as a part of her personality and it's fine.  Bike riding without training wheels, however requires both risk taking and most likely an injury or two, so I knew it was going to be a challenge.  Little did I know what a challenge it would be.  We headed over to the girl's school where there is a large tarred surface as well as a field with a dirt track around the edge.  We started with the running behind and holding the seat (which I have since learned is not the way to teach a kid to ride...who knew?) and after approximately a minute and a half, she was upset because she couldn't ride.  A minute and a half.  Now Lilly is like me in that she wants to be good at something the moment she attempts it, and does not like not being able to do something, especially in front of people, no matter who they are.  So we did all the pep talks, the relatable stories, etc.. No dice.  So we kept running behind and she kept to getting it and getting more and more upset.  We moved to the field because she was afraid of falling on the tar.  Fine.  I ran with her for a few more minutes, and then something happened.  She started to melt down.  Like an epic meltdown a two year old might have.  It was unreal.  She started bawling and screaming and generally acting very un-Lilly like.  I sort of had to step back and rub my eyes to be sure it was really happening.  I kept repeating to my self that she would remember learning to ride a bike for her entire life, so I had better choose my words and actions carefully.  Holy mother of all patience.  I asked her what was wrong.  She said she wanted to quit.  I asked her if she was scared.  No, not scared.  I asked her if she was tired.  No, not tired.  Just didn't want to do it.  I asked her why she all of a sudden didn't want to learn to ride.  She told me that she wanted to stop because it was hard.  Because it was hard.  What?!  If you know me at all, even if it is through this blog, you immediately recognized why this made me immediately and completely bat shit crazy.  You do not quit something because it is hard.  Ever.  Because it is hard is the reason you try even more.  I stopped for half a moment so that I didn't completely lose my mind, took several deep breaths, counted to twenty, I think, and then went in for the talk.   I told her that we wouldn't be stopping because it was hard.  If she was scared or tired or anything else she could get off the bike no problem.  She wasn't any of those things she said, she just didn't want to do it because it was hard.  What happened next was not anything she expected.  I told her to get on the bike and she was going to ride.  She refused.  I told her that she was getting on the bike, and assisted her in the process.  She was yelling and crying that she could not and wouldn't.  I proceeded to run around with her for half an hour all the while she was crying and hollering and generally being a pain in the ass about the whole thing.  Now, I know this may sound like an odd thing to make your kid do, why not just walk away?  Who cares if she ever learns to ride without training wheels?  I do.  Because SHE wants to learn to ride without training wheels.  If she didn't, I wouldn't, but I am not letting any child of mine quit something because it is hard.  No way.  So after about half an hour, HALF AN HOUR of torture for her and for me,she stopped crying and started pedalling more and stopped ditching off the bike every two feet, and started steering and trying and smiling and finally laughing.  She got so close to getting it but wasn't 100% confident that she could do it.  We were all tired by then, and she had had enough, but for the right reasons this time.We left the playground happy and with a feeling of hope that she would get it the next time we went out.  The next weekend we went to a different park with a different kid, and she got it.  After five minutes, she totally had her balance and steering and confidence and a giant smile.  No tears, no ditching the bike, a new found pride, and just a touch of cockiness around the edges.  She can ride.  SHE CAN RIDE!  She finally understood why I was so adamant that she not quit the week before.  I was so proud that she actually put everything she had into it.  I think she learned that hard work, put into something difficult can yield amazing results.  I learned that patience, as hard as it can be to hold onto at times, is something that makes all the difference in the world. 

Happy Birthday Maya!

Today my sweet youngest child, you turn four.  Four.  How did that happen so quickly?  I swear, just the other day you were bald, tiny (relatively speaking), and wordless.  Now, you are so tall, and cannot stop talking.  You want to know about everything.  You draw everything.  You are an amazing artist.  You draw things that I cannot believe you can do.  You spend a good portion of each day drawing elaborate scenes and writing words that you have memorized.  It blows me away.  You also love to play outside.  The swings are your favorite and you can go so high on your own now.  You tell me all the time, "look, Mama, I am touching the sky!"  You love to dress up, and also love a good mud pie. You wake up happy every day.  A happy like I didn't know existed.  You shine when you wake.  Shine and glow and smile.  It is my favorite way you look, and I have yet to capture it on film for fear of spoiling the moment. You love to ride your bike and got a new one from Nana and Grandpa a few days early for your birthday.You choose your own clothes every day, and usually come up with some very interesting combinations, but we roll with it because you are doing it all on your own, and they're just clothes, after all.  You have a fierce love for your sisters.  You are kind, sweet, gentle with animals and babies, and you claim to be the fastest runner in all the world.  You want to run all the time, no matter where we are going, and always ask, "can we run today?" Yo are sensitive, so sensitive and are quick to weep if you feel you have been wronged, but also bounce back quickly if we can make you laugh. You love to help in the kitchen, always asking if you can help me make dinner or if we can bake something.  You love to stir and crack eggs. You love Ryleigh endlessly, and call her your best buddy.  You treat her like a sister, and love to try to boss her around, but she has become wise to the fact that she doesn't have to listen to you, and that annoys you a bit.  You love to sing.  Your favorite song right now is, 'We're not gonna take it' by Twisted Sister.  You sing every word.  One day you asked me, "Mama, what they're not gonna take anymore?"  So funny that you actually listen to and think about what they're saying.  When you want to know the definition of something you say, "what means_____" which I think is a very sweet way to ask.  You have a major sweet tooth.  You sneak over to Nana and Grandpa's house to get a treat from the candy jar.  You think it is hilarious to sneak over there and not tell anyone you are going.  Nana called me a few weeks ago to ask me if I knew that you were over there.  It was 7:30  in the morning and just wanted to visit, so you went right over.  You love to be with them.  You are very attached to Daddy and tell him everyday when he leaves for work that you'll miss him and draw him a picture while he's gone, and you always do.  You love to play superheroes with Daddy.  You also love to paint with him.  You are becoming quite your own special person.  My sweet Maya, when you were born, I knew that you were amazing.  you have continued to prove it to me each and every day.  I will never forget that from day one you have done it your way, and that way usually works out.  I am so thankful that you made it through being sick as a teeny (again relatively) baby in the hospital,  that you were strong enough to pull through and be with us.  I am thankful every day for you, and remember how scary it was in the beginning often.  You are tough and always have been.  I have never met anyone like you.  You are crazy and silly and outgoing and caring, and you always want to pat every dog we see.  You love to say hi to Irish Grandpa in heaven when a crow flies by, and always say it so confidently and happily, like that crow is actually him, it makes me smile every time.  You love picking flowers and handing them out and always bring me a wishing dandelion on our walks.  I love you so very much my sweet girl, and cannot believe that you are four years old.  Happy, Happy Birthday. 

Up on the roof

We went to visit my grandmother for Easter this year.  We had a great time, and the kids favorite thing was, without a doubt, playing on the roof of her garage.  The roof is flat, and large, plus its just one big step up, as she lives on a hill and the house is up above the roof line of the garage.  I remember playing up there when I was a kid and loving it. nHaving a healthy respect for the edge and feeling totally comfortable up there. They were completely thrilled with being allowed to play up there. I have to be honest, though. As much as I adored doing that as a kid, it made me so nervous and crazy as a parent...all those fears of them FALLING OFF THE ROOF!  They didn't, and had a great time, but it was my least favorite thing about the trip, and I am so not a hoverer, but for some reason I just couldn't go along peacefully with this one...
(all roof adventures completely supervised under several competent adults!)

Maya's favorite colors

Upon asking Maya what her favorite color was, I got this response; "Momma, I love all the colors! Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and violeNt, 'cause they're all so pretty!"

Huh.

Running my first half

I ran my first half marathon this weekend.  I ran with my Dad who is a seasoned marathonner, but who has never run a half.  He is very patient and helps me along, as he is much faster and has been doing this for over ten years.  I truly value our running time together.  This race was in Providence, RI and was very hilly.  The weather was overcast and about 75 and humid.  We were very lucky the sun stayed away until almost the end.  This race was, hands down, the hardest physical challenge I have ever completed in my life.  Including having three children without pain medication.  It was HARD.  It was hilly.  It was so much more than I ever expected it to be.  The last 2.5 miles were torturous.  I have always had a ton of respect and awe for marathonners, but after this weekend it has magnified by 100.  This was really challenging to me mentally and physically.  The training plan I followed was not enough mileage for me, to get me ready for this.  I am slow, and the plan was mostly time based, not mileage based, except for the long run, so I think I will try a mileage based program next time. I am very proud of my accomplishment, and know that I put in a ton of hard work to get there.  I will definitely try another one (although immediately after crossing the finish i swore to my mother that I would never do another one), after I have many more 10+ mile runs under my belt.  It was lovely to see my girls, Will, and my Mom at the finish line, and I have never been happier to have an ice cold drink in all my life.  I got a really nice medal for my efforts, and proceeded to wear it for the rest of the day!  We also made a mini vacation out of our weekend and visited the zoo and Newport.  It was a lot of fun, but exhausting.  All in all it was an amazingly transforming experience, one I plan to have again several months down the road.